All's Quiet on the Amy Front

Gay title, I know. I couldn't think of anything better for the moment. I haven't blogged in so long. It's mostly because I can't get on MySpace at work anymore, and after spending the whole day in front of the computer at work, I don't much feel like getting on here at night. But tonight, I'm home alone and just thinking. I also haven't had too much to blog about. I haven't fallen down any stairs, nearly knocked down my house with some hair-brained home renovation project or locked myself out of my car or house lately. It's kind of odd actually... for things to feel semi-normal. I finally feel like I sort of "fit" where I am. I don't know if its because Scott's as crazy as I am... or if he's just normal enough that it balances me out, but I know that I am happier right now than I have been for as long as I can remember. I've been spending so much time with him at his house, that it almost feels weird to be home alone. I'm sure it helps that all of my friends are so happy too. Everyone is either getting engaged, getting married or preparing to start a family. It's exciting. I'm just knocking on wood (knock, knock) that this trend of happiness continues.

Love everyone!

How gorgeous?!

I have always loved weird flowers. Before I bought my house, I lived in an apartment in this neighborhood. I used to walk my dog around all over the neighborhood to check out other people's flowers. There was one in particular that I always said I would plant in my yard... whenever I had my own yard. Well, now I do and I just happened to buy a house with two of the trees in the yard. They are Angel's trumpets and I just love them. The blossoms hang downward and I've never seen any other flower quite like it. One of the trees is blooming right now and I just wanted to share.

Well... I tried

Saturday, Scott had invited some people over to watch football at his house on his new tv. He was frustrated that he'd not had time to mow the grass during the week and he had to work on Saturday. So, I decided I would surprise him and mow his yard while he was at work. I checked the weather report and it wasn't going to be too hot so I figured, why not?

I got out there and cranked the mower with no problem. I made the first ring around the yard and cut too close to the back porch. Wham! I hit the concrete and the mower chokes off. I flip it to the side to confirm that I have bent the blade. It's bent so bad that its digging into the ground.

So, I find a wrench and take off the blade. I stand on it, thinking just maybe I can bend it back into place. No go. So I get in the car and head to the hardware store to find a replacement blade. I found one that matched but asked a salesperson to confirm that it would work. He looks it over and agrees that it is the right size. I explain that its my boyfriend's new mower and that I was trying to surprise him and managed to tear it up. He laughed hysterically. At least I made his day. But he did tell me to tell Scott that his wife wouldn't even TOUCH a lawn mower and that he should hang on to a woman that was even willing to help. I made sure to tell him.

So maybe those flowers weren't for nothing after all?

For No Reason

Every girl loves to get flowers. But the best kind are the ones that you get for no reason. And when I say ‘no reason’ I mean that it’s not your birthday, Valentine’s Day or an anniversary. I’m talking about the kind of flowers that are just to say “I appreciate you.” It doesn’t matter what kind or color they are, they are always the most beautiful. I’m still getting used to having someone who constantly reminds me how much he appreciates me and what I do for him. He’s amazing and I only hope he knows how much I appreciate him as well.



Thank you again for the beautiful flowers!

Add it to the list...

So…

I ran out of gas again last night… at the Franklin/Tuskegee exit. It was a mess! I walked half a mile to the exit to find out there was NOTHING! A repo-man driving a tow truck picked me up, took me to a gas station and then took me back to my car. On the way back to my car, we saw a tow truck picking up what I thought was MY CAR. So the entire way there, I’m panicking, thinking that my car has been impounded and Jennifer is calling every minute to make sure I haven’t been hacked into small pieces by this stranger. Thank God the car was still there. When I started to pour the gas into my car, it went all over my feet instead because there was a big crack in the nozzle. Luckily for me, my repo-man was thoroughly prepared and had a large funnel I could use. Poor fella! He even followed me to the next exit to make sure I made it and gave me his number in case it ever happened in his area again (LOL!). When I finally got gas in my car and got back on the road, I got lost trying to find Niffers to pick up Scott. They were closing and had already turned off the lights so I kept driving past it. Of course, he was a bit inebriated and was mad because the bartender wouldn’t serve him a drink at 10:27 when they don’t close until 10:30. Apparently they were very rude to him and he was pretty ticked off about it. So he was not the least bit sympathetic to what all I had been through.

So, I didn’t sleep at all last night and I have a pounding headache. I’m waiting for the morning mail to come in to see if there is important things in it for me to post on the website. When that’s done… I am out of here!

How it got worse...

I barely slept Sunday night. So I woke feeling pretty crappy on Monday morning and made the drive home from Valley. I get home about the time I would normally be getting up for work. So I get in the shower... and am attacked by a weird looking lizard. Well, maybe not attacked but he did jump on me. Not a pleasant surprise in the shower. I finish showering managing to stay on the other side of the tub from the lizard. I go get my clothes out of the dryer (also known as how Amy irons her clothing). The pants are hot and a little snug from drying. I do the typical "stretch out your pants" bend and hear a ripping sound. Great. The whole seam of the butt of my pants split wide open. There is no time to "iron" another pair of pants so I just go with the wrinkles.

Work was typical. I told my co-workers about my morning and they all got a good laugh. I fought sleep all day. I found out late in the afternoon that I would also be working until close at American Eagle. Great. So I go straight home, eat a quick bite, change clothes and head out... the following is a re-enactment of how my day got worse.



Yes, I just whacked right into the car that was parked at the end of my driveway. Totally didn't see it there. Had to knock on the neighbors doors to find out who's car it was. Had to stand in the rain and wait for a cop to come do the accident report. Was late to work. It was an overall GREAT day. Today can only be better.

Sigh...

What Auburn Students Are Really Up To!

The following video was made by a couple of Auburn students. They never imagined what a success it would be. Read the article below! I also included the lyrics cause I had trouble understanding some of it myself. ENJOY!

Teixeira tribute hits the airwaves

By Mike Tankersley

A few weeks ago, a couple of self-described average college kids were fooling around on the guitar, and now -- to their amazement -- they have a cult following.

And the best is yet to come.

Tyler Crawford and Andrew Hall, who have been roommates at Auburn University for about a month, sat down one night in early August and, off the top of their heads, wrote a tribute to Mark Teixeira, a player the Atlanta Braves acquired July 31, the major league trading deadline.

For a lark, they decided to write a song about the new player. It took about 30 minutes.

"Once we wrote the first line," Crawford said, "the rest of it kind of just came to us."

Crawford and Hall recorded the song onto the voice mail of Hall's cell phone so they wouldn't forget the tune.

"We couldn't stop laughing," Crawford said.

A few days later, they borrowed a camera with a video function, and in about four takes produced a video. They first posted it to Facebook.com, then a day later put it on YouTube.com.

"We only posted it so our friends could see it," said Crawford, who strums the guitar throughout the catchy song that so far is titled simply "Mark Teixeira Tribute."

"We were just goofing around," Hall added. "We thought our friends would get a kick out of it."

What followed amazed Crawford and Hall.

Michael Brouder, director of marketing and on-air promotions for SportSouth/FSN South in Atlanta, discovered the video.

"It made the rounds in the office, and we thought it was great," Brouder said.

He got an idea. The video, he thought, might be a creative way to pump excitement into the network's late-season Braves broadcasts.

Brouder tracked down the students through You-
Tube.com.

"I actually created my own YouTube account to send them an e-mail," he said.

In the e-mail, Brouder asked Hall and Crawford if they wanted their video seen "by 11 million viewers in the Southeast."

Hall and Crawford were blown away.

"Fifteen minutes later, we heard from them," Brouder said.

SportSouth played a clip from their video during Sunday night's game. Teixeira followed the act in style, slamming a pair of two-run homers. TBS, which also carries Braves games on TV, also played some of the song.

The fuse had been lit.

"At first, there were maybe two comments and 100 hits," said Crawford, who hails from Chelsea. "We were watching it on YouTube and we thought it was so cool so many people had watched it."

By the end of the weekend, more than 47,000 people had viewed the video. That number had ballooned to 56,000 by Monday night.

"It's really blown up," said Hall, an Athens native.

Hall and Crawford are realistic. They know the song won't bring them a fortune. But the effort has produced plenty of excitement.

Today they'll record the song at the SportSouth/FSN South studio in Atlanta. The plan was for the two to record the song again for use in the Atlanta pregame show, "Braves Live," before tonight's game at Cincinnati.

But Jeff Genthner, Senior Vice President and General Manager for FSN South, has other ideas.

"If they nail it in rehearsal," Genthner said Monday, "we're going to have them play it live. Hey, the Braves play baseball live, not live on tape."

To say Genthner loves the song is an understatement.

"When I saw it, I immediately thought, this is what SportSouth is," Genthner said. "It's two guys sitting on a couch singing a homemade song about the Braves.

"It has catchy lyrics. These guys are really talented."

SportSouth already has turned the video into two on-air promotions that began airing during Monday night's Braves telecast. (FSN South and SportSouth are both owned by Fox).

On Aug. 31, as guests of the team, Hall and Crawford will perform the song live in the plaza at Turner Field before the Mets-Braves game. And they'll get to meet Teixeira.

"We're the filler act for when they switch sets for the bands," Hall said. "I mean, we've got just the one song."

Hall and Crawford aren't taking themselves too seriously. But they're enjoying the moment.

"This really is a dream," said Hall, who is engaged to Crawford's sister, Emily. "This is one of those things where you just have to take advantage of where it takes you.

"And if all we get out of it is playing the song at Turner Field and playing it once at SportSouth, well, I figure it's a story we can tell for the rest of our lives."


LYRICS:
VERSE 1
Four and a half games back and I don't Te-care-a
You know why we got Mark Teixeira
Got a new Braves jersey that I'm gonna wear-a
And written on the back is Mark Teixeira
The Mets are scared cause their lead's gonna narr-a
They're lookin' over their shoulder at Mark Teixeira

Chorus:
We got Fred McGriff back in '93
Hampton's out cause of injury
Schuerholz smiles cause he is happy and Bobby says,
"Let's go Mark T."

The National League it just ain't fair-a
The Atlanta Braves got Mark Teixeira
Chipper and Andruw make a mighty nice pair-a
Let's make it a trio add Mark Teixeira
A side effect is mild hysteria
The medical reason is Mark Teixeira

Chorus

Bridge:
Scott Thorman stinks and Julio is old
What did Shuerholz do? Must've sold his Sooouuulll

Pitchers beware cause he's gonna scare ya
Throw him a strike now if you dare-a
He could probably steal on Yogi Berra(NOT Yogi Bear-a)
Biggest thing in Georgia since Scarlet O'Hara
If I were a woman I'd probably Marry ya.

And that's not Gay cause its Mark Teixeira

Boy, I Feel Stupid

Yeah, it’s Monday. I went to Biloxi this weekend with Scott, Jennifer and Justin. Scott and I were so tired that when we got home at 6:30 pm, we went straight to sleep. And we slept pretty solid until he had to get up early this morning to go to work.

Yet, somehow I’m still tired. Tired enough that my brain is apparently not functioning properly. I was going to stop by the little shop at the end of my road and pick up a croissant for breakfast, but discovered that it was closed. So, I detoured over to the McDonald’s across the street. I ordered, pulled up to the first window and paid. Then… drove away. I didn’t realize until I got to work, that I failed to stop at the second window and actually receive the food that I just paid for. I’m really not sure how I did that. I could try to blame it on all the kids around me that were walking to school or the fact that I was laughing at Rick and Bubba going on and on about the trooper’s “Take Back Our Highways” crap. But not today… today I think its just me and that my brain is still in Biloxi mode. It didn’t want to be back in work mode. So I aalready warned my co-workers that my stomach will be growling in our Monday morning meeting.

Sigh… breakfast anyone?

Weekend Warriors

This weekend was so productive! I decided that since Scott had to work on Saturday, that I would find myself something productive to do while he was gone. I just cleaned up a little and got him some new bedding. He works so much that he just doesn't have time to do things like that for himself. Well, I jumped started something and we were inspired to do even more.

We spent Sunday renovating the master half bath. We painted the walls a deep red. We pulled up the carpet and put down the old-fashioned black and white checkered vinyl floor. It made an incredible difference in there in just one day. And I think it's awesome that we survived "Extreme Makeover: Valley Edition" without even arguing. I think that's a pretty good relationship test!

There was only one catastrophe… and it was a typical Amy event. I was putting the second coat of paint on the walls while Scott was outside getting ready to cut the grass. And being the nosy person that I am, while standing on the seat of the toilet, I peeked out the bathroom window to see what he was doing. I managed to knock over a large jar candle that was lit on the tank of the toilet. And of course, it poured hot wax down one leg and then landed on my toe. Luckily, it wasn't hot enough to scald me, but my toe was purple and bleeding. So I start to scramble and clean it up so that I won't have to be embarrassed and tell him what I had done. No such luck. He heard the banging all the way outside and came in to see if I was ok and caught me covered in blue candle wax and bleeding. So, he decided it was probably best (and safer) for him to pull up the carpet. I went to get a hammer out of the tool box to get up carpet tacks. Well, I didn't know that it was a "McGyver" hammer that converts into a screw driver. The head of the hammer fell off… and you guessed it, landed right on the same toe! So, Scott made me sit on the edge of the bed where he could see me with an ice pack on my toe. He said he would be able to get more work done if he wasn't worried about me injuring myself. Go figure!

Once the carpet was up, I was in charge of putting down the new tiles. After the incidents so far, he was kind of nervous about leaving me alone with a utility knife. Progress was moving right along and I got up to get some more tiles. When I sat back down, I sat right on a screw driver… which didn't really hurt but it surprised me so I yelled Ouch! And of course he came running… he just knew I'd cut myself! Poor Scott! I'm going to make him a nervous wreck! I'm just so excited that things are going so well with me and him. I never saw this coming but I couldn't be happier about it!

Family Portrait

I don't think I have ever seen a serious portrait of my family. There is probably a good reason. My parents just got back from visiting mom's family in North Carolina. They took some pictures to bring back to me and siblings since we couldn't go. This is one of my mom's brother, Uncle Biggie, saying hello and he misses us:


Yes, I said Biggie... until I was about 10 I didn't know that Biggie wasn't his real name. I also have an Uncle Skeeter and an Uncle Alphas if that tells you anything? I also have a picture of my grandmother on a four-wheeler giving the same expression. If we can't see each other very often, the least we can do is send each other entertaining pictures.

I love you guys and I miss you!!

Update:
After my mom read this post, she gave me a few other bits of funny information. Apparently Uncle Alphas' (who is related by marriage) name on his birth certificate was actually... brace yourself for this... Alphas Omega. He later had it changed. I can't imagine why?

Happy Friday!

Last night was great! I went to the Wesson's and learned how to play Bunko. I wasn't sure that I understood everything but as soon as the game started I picked it up. I can't wait to play again and I'll be sure to bring my own drinks next time so I won't be too shy to scream "Big Bunko!"

I've also moved to a new project on my house. I recently acquired a Woodchuck Cider sign from my favorite bar. It inspired me to finally finish taking down the wallpaper in my kitchen and decorate around the sign. So far all I have done is paint the top half of the walls a dark green, but it already looks so much better than the icky teapot wallpaper that was up there. Is it sad that I am so excited about decorating my kitchen in a beer theme? Who cares! I love it!


It's been a loooong week and I'm so glad its Friday! I'll be dipping out of work a little early today since its completely dead around here. I've gotten so much accomplished with everyone gone to the annual meeting. So I think I deserve to be able to leave early!

Overall, I just feel GREAT! I'm smiling and laughing all the time and I look forward to every day… which unfortunately has not always been the case. Hmm… wonder what could be making me feel like this? :)

Can I Please Just Go Back to Bed?

I had trouble getting to sleep last night even though I was physically exhausted. I am doggy sitting for my parents while they are visiting my Grandma in North Carolina. One of the dogs is actually mine and she's used to visiting me, but the other one really doesn't seem to like being in a strange house. She whined constantly all night long. Anybody who knows me, knows that I am an extremely light sleeper and I can't sleep through any kind of noise. So, I tossed and turned miserably all night.

So, when the alarm went off (it didn't have to wake me up) I drug myself out of bed. Of course, the doggies who I know didn't sleep all night are up and dancing around wanting their morning treats. Funny how chipper they are considering all the whining that went on all night. I get ready and leave the house a few minutes early to stop by somewhere for breakfast… since there is absolutely nothing to eat or drink in my house. I start to roll through the intersection in front of my house… please note, I do not have a stop sign but the other direction does. Does he stop? Does he look both ways? Does he even pause for a brief moment? Hell no! He almost plows right into the side of me and its not until I lay on my horn that he even realizes that I am there. I say a few choice words although I know he can't hear me and then continue on my way. I stop for breakfast and then head toward work. On Madison, a nice little sporty car is backing out of his driveway and at a pretty fast speed for reverse. Does he pause at the end of the driveway to make sure it is clear before he pulls out? Hell no! He backs out right in front of me while I'm doing 45. Luckily there are two lanes and I am able to swerve around him, again saying a few more choice words.

So, I finally arrive at work to find our e-mail is down. This is nothing for me to panic about, but to all of the people who are leaving the office very shortly to head to the annual meeting, this is apparently cause for widespread panic. I have only been out of bed for about an hour and all of this has already happened. I really want to just go home and get back in bed!! So, someone please give me something to smile about today!

Ok, ok, I’ll blog!

Yes, I know I haven’t blogged in a while. It has not been due to lack of material, but lack of time to type it all. Our annual meeting is the end of this week and the office has been a madhouse. Everyone packs up and heads down to Point Clear, Alabama for the meeting tomorrow and things will settle down for me after that.

Other than that, things are going great! I’m happier than I have been in a really long time. I feel like I have finally gotten out from under a certain little black cloud that has been following me for years. I only have myself to blame for letting it follow me for so long, but I have a certain someone to thank for helping me find my way out of it. I finally saw the light and realized that I deserved so much better than the crap I had been dealing with. I’m finally figuring out what I want out of life and it feels incredible.

Ok… enough with the mushy stuff. I know everyone only reads my blogs to hear what stupid things I’ve done lately. So here goes one...

Well, I stayed in Valley last night (which for those of you who don’t know is about an hour from me and is on Eastern time). If I leave at the same time as Scott I can make it home about the time I would normally be getting up and get ready for work… which works out pretty nicely. But this morning, when I went to leave, my purse was no where to be found! I dug through my car and looked around his house, but nope. Not there. So the problem with that is, I don’t have enough gas to make it home and no means to get any without my purse. Luckily, I noticed it was missing BEFORE Scott left for work. I really don’t think he knew quite what he was getting into when he decided to get involved with me, but I'm sure he is figuring it out very quickly. He had to follow me to the gas station to loan me money and I made him late for work! Poor guy! I hope he already knew what a mess I am and expected nothing less from me.

So, thank you, baby for not leaving me stranded! Bear with me! This is probably the first of many. But I’m glad you got to be my hero this time!

One Lucky Girl

I feel so loved! And I don’t mean in the romantic sense. I mean in the sense that I have some really great friends. The past year started out pretty rough for me. I went through a really bad break up, got adjusted to a new job, bought my first house, lived alone for the first time… really just learned to be an adult. Some of it was pretty tough. But the best thing by far that has come out of this past year are the friends that I have made along the way.

I am a firm believer in the fact that everything happens for a reason. Thanks to Jennifer, I met Kelly at a time in my life when I needed her the most. I have done some really stupid things since I’ve known her and she has always been there for me to help me pick myself back up. She’s never judgemental or hypocritical, just always supportive. I’m not sure what I would have done this year without her. A year doesn’t seem like that long, but sometimes I feel like we’ve known each other forever… especially when we seem to always finish each others sentences.

Through Kelly I have also been introduced to a lot of other great people. I realized on the way home from Auburn this weekend just how lucky I am. I spent the weekend with a group of people who don’t care where you work, how much money you make, how you dress, how much you weigh or any of that kind of trivial stuff. They only care that you are a good person and you are fun to be around. I had the best time because I could just be myself for once. I am the happiest I have been in a very long time and I think I am finally just comfortable with who I am and with the people I am choosing to spend my time with. It’s a really great feeling!

Thanks for this weekend you guys! You know who you are and I love you all!

Why You Should Never IM Me

Friend (8:43:06 PM): hows it goin
OmySue (8:44:04 PM): maaan, i want some cookies or something
OmySue (8:44:10 PM): having a sweet craving
Friend (8:44:24 PM): lol
OmySue (8:44:44 PM): and i'm already in my pajamas and no way i am getting dressed again to go back out
OmySue (8:44:45 PM): lol
OmySue (8:44:54 PM): gonna go raid the pantry...
OmySue (8:44:59 PM): totally almost put panty
OmySue (8:45:00 PM): brb
OmySue (9:03:02 PM): mission accomplished
OmySue (9:03:08 PM): pb and jelly
OmySue (9:03:17 PM): almost was just a pb
OmySue (9:03:27 PM): i swear the lid to the jelly was cemented on
OmySue (9:03:39 PM): mother F’er
OmySue (9:03:44 PM): jelly on the keyboard
Friend (9:04:09 PM): well thats a sticky mess
OmySue (9:04:25 PM): only on letter between H and K
OmySue (9:04:37 PM): i -ust won’t use it anymore
Friend (9:04:55 PM): lol
OmySue (9:05:17 PM): until i forget and stick my finger in it
Friend (9:05:46 PM): yeah... and if I can think of any questions that require that key I will be sure to ask
Friend (9:06:02 PM): that is my duty
OmySue (9:06:21 PM): and you said duty
Friend (9:06:59 PM): yes I did say duty
OmySue (9:07:18 PM): oh look... u said it again
OmySue (9:10:36 PM): and the JJJJ is back
OmySue (9:10:37 PM): all clean
OmySue (9:11:08 PM): i just figured i'd wait until i was done eating... cause i was likely to drop some more
OmySue (9:11:16 PM): and why bother to clean it twice
OmySue (9:11:36 PM): so… i think i pulled a muscle in my back
Friend (9:11:37 PM): yeah?
OmySue (9:11:41 PM): and it is spasming
OmySue (9:11:46 PM): shooting pains in my back
OmySue (9:11:56 PM): damn YOU jelly jar!
Friend (9:12:20 PM): ok ok calm down I am sure the jelly jar is sorry for your pain
OmySue (9:12:47 PM): yeah, i'm sure... thats why it told some of its contents to jump on my J?
OmySue (9:12:57 PM): hmm... that sounds weird
OmySue (9:13:01 PM): have i been drinking
OmySue (9:13:04 PM): i dunno
OmySue (9:13:10 PM): did i just answer myself?
OmySue (9:13:13 PM): i think i did
OmySue (9:13:20 PM): maybe i should lie down
OmySue (9:14:18 PM): nope... i think i'm good

Rain, rain

Today at lunch, my mom, sister and niece came to my house to eat with me. While we were sitting around the table talking and eating it started to thunder. My sister decided she would run out to the car before it started raining and grab her cigarettes so she could smoke under my covered front porch. As soon as she made it out the door, the bottom fell out and it started to pour. She called from the car and I of course answered saying “ha ha ha ha ha!” She said she was going to stay out there till the rain slowed down a bit. The thunder was booming right over our heads, and shortly after, I got this text message from her:

“That shit was close!”

She came running in when it slowed for a minute and I heard her scream when I big boom sounded overhead as she ran to the front door. Of course, she was soaked and I was laughing hysterically. But of course, I failed to remember that it was also pouring on my car. Which has a hole in the soft top. Which is right over the driver’s seat. Which means that my butt got completely soaked on the way back to work. Man I hate karma!

I Put My Arms Around You

Those of you who were around me last summer, know that I got completely hooked on So You Think You Can Dance. I was rooting for Benji (who did win) from the day of his audition. I watched the show just to see him dance every week. This season, I didn't think I would be interested in watching because Benji would be gone. WRONG! Benji's sister Lacey is on this season and she is great. The dance she did with her partner last night gave me chills and even made me tear up. Now, thats a powerful dance. It was a beautiful interpretation of an incredible song.

It touched me, so I wanted to share. So, here's the lyrics to the song and the video:

Dancing by Elisa
Time is gonna take my mind
and carry it far away where I can fly
The depth of life will dim my temptation to live for you
If I were to be alone silence would rock my tears
'cause it's all about love and I know better
How life is a waving feather

So I put my arms around you around you
And I know that I'll be leaving soon

My eyes are on you they're on you
And you see that I can't stop shaking
No, I won't step back but I'll look down to hide from your eyes
'cause what I feel is so sweet and I'm scared that even my own breath
Oh could burst it if it were a bubble
And I'd better dream if I have to struggle

So I put my arms around you around you
And I hope that I will do no wrong
My eyes are on you they're on you
And I hope that you won't hurt me

I'm dancing in the room as if I was in the woods with you
No need for anything but music
Music's the reason why I know time still exists
Time still exists
Time still exists
Time still exists

So I put my arms around you around you
And I hope that I will do no wrong
My eyes are on you they're on you
And I hope that you won't hurt me

Feet!

So, for the last couple of days I have gotten messages and friend requests on MySpace from some really strange people. Today especially, I got several friend requests from people named "Trample Me" and "Stomp Me Flat." And I know I have big feet and all, but I couldn't figure out how in the world the Montgomery area foot fetish community had gotten me on their list!!

Then I realized... my new default picture was of my feet in the sand! Well, duh... that must have done it!! So, no more feet picture for me and maybe that will keep some of the freaks away.... the creepy ones anyway.

Cloud Nine

I am having SUCH a great day! One of the greatest feelings is to be told by a complete stranger that they think you are beautiful... especially when you think that person is attractive as well. I had been feeling pretty bad lately and that was exactly what I needed. So, I am on cloud nine today! Somebody join me up here!

Another One of Those Typical Weekends

At the beginning of Friday, I thought this was going to be a really crappy weekend. I thought I was going to have to work at AE on both Friday and Saturday night. But I got a phone call from my manager in the afternoon telling me that I wouldn't be needed either night. So, I decided to make dinner plans with Kelly and drive to Auburn. So as soon as I got off work, I picked up an early birthday and 'thank you for rescuing me' present for Drue and headed their way. Kelly and I went to get pedicures and do girly stuff before dinner. So, I'm sitting there in the big massaging chair with my feet soaking in the little spa, reading a two-year-old issue of Cosmo and feeling pretty relaxed. And suddenly I hear "blooop" and something has hit the water. I hesitate for a moment and think, "Hmmm, what was that?" And then I realized that my cell phone is no longer lying in my lap beneath the magazine. I scramble to dig my phone out of the foot water but the damage is already done. Its full of water. Me and Kelly took the battery out and set it under the nail drying lamps the rest of the time we are there. By some miracle, my phone STILL WORKS!

So, we get back to the house and meet up with everyone else. Jennifer and Wes, Kelly and Drue, and me and Scott all go to dinner at Outback. Wes proposed to Jennifer at dinner so lots of drinks and celebration was in order! CONGRATS JENN AND WES! We all had a good time and for once, got good service.

Saturday morning Drue had to work, so me, Kelly and Scott go to breakfast at Cracker Barrel and my karma returns. It took us 15 minutes to wait in line to get a table, 15-20 more minutes for our waitress to come out and take even our drink order. Then we are still waiting for our food to come out when we hear the sound of crashing dishes. It wasn't close to us at all so I say jokingly "I hope that wasn't our food." Scott and I had our backs to the sound, but I could see Kelly watching closely and she says "Oh no. Our waitress is over there." A moment later she comes to our table and she is carrying plates. She gives us all plates but Scott is missing his main entrée. She says to him "Your French toast is on the floor." I was fully expecting whatever hit the floor to be mine, and so at this point I die laughing. The waitress apologizes and explains how she is having a terrible day and woke up late and didn't even have time to take a shower (which is way more than I think any of us wanted to know). She comes back out in just a few minutes with a plate piled high with French toast covered with strawberries and whip cream. She makes a point to tell Scott that she took her time and fixed it for him herself. I leaned over and whispered "…says the waitress who just told you she didn't take a bath today." I couldn't resist and the look on his face assured me that he appreciated me pointing out that fact while he had his first bite in his mouth.

After breakfast I head back to Montgomery. On the drive, I start thinking what am I going to do tonight since I don't have to work? And then I remember hearing that there is a birthday celebration going on at the StrongFold show this weekend for Nikki and Anthony, but I can't remember where they are playing. I get home and call Dave and find out they are playing in Pascagoula, MS and not in Mobile like I had hoped. I was disappointed for a minute but he assures me that Pascagoula is not too much farther than Mobile. I hesitate for just a moment… and call Scott and say "Would you think I was crazy if I asked you to drive to Pascagoula, Mississippi with me tonight?" (I know what you are thinking, he probably already knows I'm crazy). I hear a little hesitation in his voice and tell him to think about it and call me back. I give him StrongFold's website and a rundown of what kind of music they play since I know he and I share taste for their kind of music. In the long run, we decide to go and hit the road!

This is the first time that Scott and I have ever done anything alone together so I was a little nervous about the long drive. But once we got on the road, we started telling stories and joking and having a really good time. The next thing we know, its almost midnight, we haven't been paying attention to the road… and we really aren't sure where we are. The next sign we see says "New Orleans 52 miles." And I of course say no way, that a 1 must have fallen off the front of that. So the next exit we come to is a rest area and we decide to stop and look at a map and see exactly where we are. As we coast off the exit, we see a sign that says "Welcome to Mississippi" and I'm thinking that's odd because I know we have been in MS for a long time. We walk up to the building and there is a big sign that says "Restrooms open 24 hours" and just beneath that, a sign that says "Restrooms Closed." How ironic.

But we found a map and realized that yes, you guessed it, this is the welcome center for people entering Mississippi from Louisiana!! We drove 75 miles past our exit. Yes, I know. I don't know how it happened either and we probably should be ashamed of ourselves. But I can only say that we were so engrossed in conversation that we lost track of time and stopped paying attention to the road. We did finally make it to the show in time to hear the last five or so songs. But we had a great time hanging out with the StrongFold boys, just like I always do. We got to the hotel as the sun was coming up. I barely remember setting the alarm to make sure we wake up in time for checkout.The next thing I know, Scott is waking me up and the clock says its after noon… an hour past checkout time. Oops.

So, we decide to drive over to Foley and eat at Lambert's and catch some rolls. Then we drive down to Gulf Shores and swim in the ocean for hours. The time spent in the ocean completely made up for the whole driving ordeal… for me at least anyway. It was a perfect day for the beach. Beautiful weather. Calm water. Perfect. And we were kept thoroughly entertained by the Mexican men trying to get on floats out in the ocean. I don't know which was funnier, watching them flip and slide and fall off the floats, or listening to them laugh and make fun of each other as they did it. They noticed us laughing at them too and one of them says pointing to his friend (and sounds just like Speedy Gonzales I must add) "He's crazy, man! He's too fat!" I about lost it!

We got every bit of sunlight we could and decided to start heading back when it started to get dark. We tell more stories and call people to tell the story of our crazy weekend. Before we know it, its pretty late and since its Sunday night there is no where open to get dinner. We swing through a drive-through and then go to a gas station to use the bathroom before getting back on the interstate. The ladies room was occupied so I stood in the hallway while Scott went in the men's room. After a minute or two, I hear Scott's door clicking and banging and I can't help but start laughing at him. And he can hear me laughing and starts laughing too. He did finally get it open. But wouldn't it been the topper to the weekend if we'd had to call a locksmith to get Scott out of a gas station bathroom?

Scott dropped me off about 12:30am so I am pretty worn out today. But poor Scott had another hour drive to get home after dropping me off, and he's on Eastern time so he lost an hour on the way. I can't even imagine how tired he must be today! Bet he'll think twice before he accepts an invitation from me again!

Spooky Old Tree

I haven't been to Eastdale Mall in forever. But this past weekend I went with my brother and sister-in-law to look at bunnies! Yes, I know... the last thing I need. But I was seriously considering getting one until I realized they make me sneeze and itch. That kinda ruled that out.

On the way out, we passed a little area full of those kiddie rides that you put quarters in. There was this giant tree on the edge. Just looking at it creeped me out! It reminded me of those evil scary trees in the Wizard of Oz that threw apples at Dorothy. So I get up close to get a good look at it and it suddenly started blinking and talking. Of course, I screamed and ran. My brother had apparently hit some button to make it start.

Even little kids were pointing and laughing. Anyway... here is me and the tree:

My Karma is Hereditary

I just had the most interesting conversation with my mom. For those of you who don't know, I have an eight year old niece who lives with my parents. A man rang the doorbell and told my mom that he heard a little girl yelling "Help! Help! Somebody! Anybody!" Alex was in her new swing and her hair had gotten caught in the ropes. They actually had to cut the swing down to get her out. I was sitting at my desk laughing hysterically as she told me. (I'm evil, I know.) So I emailed and told my brother. His response: "Awesome. She should have taken some pictures."

My mom says we are terrible children. What can I say? Karma is hereditary!!

What to do in a Terrorist Attack

I couldn't resist posting this one. It had me in tears I was laughing so hard!

What to do in a Terrorist Attack The US government has a new website, www.ready.gov, displaying public service symbols for terrorism readiness in the tradition of the old "duck and cover" campaigns. The fun thing is that these pictures are so ambiguous they could mean anything! If you have set yourself on fire, do not run. If you spot terrorism, blow your anti-terrorism whistle. If you are bald, yell really loud. If you spot a terrorist arrow, pin it against the wall with your shoulder. If you are sprayed with an unknown substance, stand and think about it instead of seeing a doctor. Use your flashlight to lift the walls right off of you! The proper way to eliminate smallpox is to wash with soap, water, and at least one armless hand. Michael Jackson is a terrorist. If you spot this smooth criminal with dead, dead eyes, run the f*** away. Hurricanes, animal corpses, and the biohazard symbol have a lot in common. Think about it. Be on the lookout for terrorists with pinkeye and leprosy. Also, they tend to rub their hands together manically. If a door is closed, karate chop it open. If your building collapses, cower under a desk and kiss your ass goodbye. Try to absorb as much of the radiation as possible with your groin region. After 5 minutes and 12 seconds, however, you may become sterile. After exposure to radiation it is important to consider that you may have mutated to gigantic dimensions: watch your head. If you've become a radiation mutant with a deformed hand, remember to close the window. No one wants to see that shit. If you hear the Backstreet Boys, Michael Bolton or Yanni on the radio, it is a psychological terror attack. Cower in the corner or run like hell. If your lungs and stomach start talking, stand with your arms akimbo until they stop. Austin is radioactive. Move to Houston. If you are trapped under falling debris, conserve oxygen by not farting. how to ROFLMAO Do not drive a station wagon if a power pole is protruding from the hood. A one-inch thick piece of plywood should be sufficient protection against radiation. Always carry one!

Suggestions anyone?

My cable/internet bill with Charter jumped from $65 to $93 because apparently some "promotional rate" I was getting has run out. I called and argued and threatened to switch to Knology if they didn't give me a better rate and I only managed to get them to knock off a few bucks a month... and it will run out in a few months and I will have to call and argue all over again!!

Anybody have any suggestions?? Cheaper service provider? Better arguing technique?

One More Adventure

Another thing I forgot to mention... (I know, that last blog was long enough, how could I have forgotten anything?) But I wanted to wait until I had the appropriate pictures to go with it. My friend Brian took me to a little boardwalk that is right off the Spanish Fort/Fairhope exit. Just like all boardwalks, there were a few warnings and rules posted. But somehow this one struck me as funny... I think the bottom sign would have sufficed. If you read it, the second one would seem to be unneccesary.



And they weren't kidding either. There were alligators right there. And they weren't tiny ones either. It wouldn't be easy for them to get up to the boardwalk where I was, but on the other side of the lagoon from me, there was nothing stopping them from climbing up into the parking lot of the hotel on the corner. I would NOT be a happy camper if I went to get in my car and was surprized by a large alligator. Remind me never to stay at that hotel!

Weekend Run-Down

Friday:

I left for Mobile (well, actually Spanish Fort) on Friday afternoon. We were staying with Brian’s dad and stepmom there and planning to drive down to the beach on Saturday. They took me to a little mom and pop’s pizza place near their house in Spanish Fort and the three of them shared a couple of pitchers of beer. When we got back to their house, his parents crashed pretty early. So Brian and I decide we are going to take a spin on their golf cart, even though it is dark outside and the headlights don’t work. So we are zipping right along and get a couple blocks away… headed straight up hill and the golf cart dies. Completely. So we Fred Flinstone it down the hill and then resort to getting out and pushing the thing all the way back home. I was laughing hysterically while pushing and Brian was a bit intoxicated and barefoot. So this made for quite and adventure.

Saturday:

Fairly uneventful. I spent a typical day on the beach with friends and some family. The waves were incredibly high and the undertow was really strong so I didn’t get in the water too much. Not to mention my legs were still a little tired from pushing the golf cart the night before. But I did manage to make a small sand castle that I was pretty proud of!

Sunday:

I swam at Brian’s parent’s house and visited with his family. We headed home that afternoon with a couch in tow for Brian’s younger brother. It began to sprinkle on us not a mile from the house! But it didn’t last long and we didn’t see any more rain on the way up. Brian dropped me off at home and only minutes later I realized that I had left my digital camera and the keys to my brother’s house in Brian’s truck and he was headed to Millbrook. I needed the keys in order to go check on my brother’s cat. Although I had just ridden more than 2 hours back from the beach, I then had to get in my car to go get the keys… plus I wanted to take my camera on the lake on Monday. So I drove out there and had dinner with my parents… just to get a message from my sister-in-law saying that I didn’t need to go check on the cat. Oh well…

So I stopped by Wal-Mart on the way home to pick up some supplies to take to the lake with me. I got in a line with about 10 people in front of me. It was about 11:00 and there were only 2 lanes open in the whole store. I grumbled something about having 25 lanes, 2 open and employees standing around doing nothing which prompted the man in front of me to turn around and strike up a conversation. A thirty-minute long conversation mostly about his pest control business and “getting kicked by ‘the man’ while you are down.” Interesting. I was quite ready for bed by the time I got home.

Monday:

I woke up early and drove to Kelly’s house in Opelika. I was running a bit late but so was everyone else so it didn’t seem to matter. We packed up the boat and headed out on the lake. It was a little overcast at the beginning of the day but the sun eventually came out in full force and managed to burn me pretty well. By the time we got back to the house, I was scorched. We all showered off the lake water and decided to go out to dinner. When we walked out the front door of the house, I noticed that my car was absolutely covered from bumper to bumper in ants. All of our cars were parked side by side but only MY car was covered. I shrugged it off and said “Oh well, I’ll just hose off the car after dinner before I get on the road” and we went about our way.

We went to Logan’s Roadhouse Grill. We sat and talked and shared stories as people who haven’t known each other for too long always seem to do. I found myself talking about my disastrous trip to Nashville. For future reference, I should remind myself that even speaking about this trip stirs up enough bad karma that it always directly precedes a long catastrophic chain of events. We talked… and talked… and talked… and were thoroughly enjoying the conversation when we realized that we had been there over an hour and still had not received our food?? Drue went and spoke to the manager who told him that he would “check on it.” Shortly after, our waiter came by and said that he was getting it together and it should be out soon… that it was the tilapia that we ordered that held everything up.” He walked about without apologizing for our wait and not bothering to offer to refill our glasses than had been empty for nearly the whole hour. So we offered to pay for our drinks and salads. Kelly and I are both the typical kind of people who don’t like to complain and are even embarrassed when someone else sends their food back. But at that point, we gladly picked up our purses and left.

Dairy Queen became the next destination. Scott, who had not had a salad, was still hungry and me and Kelly wanted ice cream! Scott ordered a chicken sandwich and fries and they came out almost immediately. We sat and he took a big bite, made a terrible face and nearly spit the chicken out on the table. Apparently the chicken smelled and tasted like fish. I assume they fried it in the same grease… but I think if it were me, that is just not a risk I would be willing to take. At least the fries and ice cream were okay.

So, we finally head back to Kelly’s house and by now it is about 10:00 and getting really late for those of us who have to be at work early in the morning. I gather my things and start to leave and I realize that the aunts are no longer all over my car. I open the door to find that rather they are all now INSIDE the car. Lovely. So I get all of the trash out that I think they might be after… and spray some orange scented 409 since we didn’t have any big spray. It seemed to do the trick pretty well.

Finally, I get in my car and head about my way. I call my mom to let her know that I am headed back home and we had a good day on the lake. Still on the phone, about 15 miles down the road my car starts to jerk a little. I look down and realize that the gas guage which read ¼ of a tank when I pulled out of Kelly’s driveway now is below empty. No exit in sight I coast over to the side of the road. So, Kelly’s husband Drue is my new hero!! He came to my rescue with a gas can. He even followed me to the gas station and waited until I had filled up to make sure there were no more catastrophes before he headed back home.



Sigh… I got home after midnight. So today, I am extremely sunburned and very tired. The end.

80s Cartoon Kick

This weekend I got into a conversation about the cheesy 80s cartoons we used to watch when we were kids. So I have been travelling down memory lane via YouTube this morning! I know I am a little younger than some of you who read my blog... but I thought it would be fun to name some of the obscure cartoons we remember from our childhood. I'll start!!

Fraggle Rock


Jem and the Holograms


Today's Special


Picture Pages

Congrats!

This weekend was sooo busy! My best friend got married on Saturday. She didn't throw the bouquet though... cause she could have just handed it to me since I was the only single girl there! Ha! Only wish I was kiddding...

But it was a beautiful wedding and she looked incredible. I've never seen her so happy and I've known her a long time. I hope to get some good pictures of me in my dress and all dolled up. Those of you who know me, know that I don't do that very often!

So congrats to Mr. and Mrs. Justin Herring! I love you guys!

PleasePray

Passing this along for my sister-in-law and her family:
Everyone please pray for my brother and the 10th Moutain Division based out of Fort Drum, NY. As most as you have probably heard, four soldiers and their Iraqi interpreter were killed this past weekend. The three soldiers that have been captured by Al Qaeda are still missing. 4,000 troops are on the ground searching for the missing. We have not heard from my brother in several days, but we assume he is out searching day and night. At this point, my family just wants to hear from him to know he's okay. When something like this happens, they cut off all phone/internet communication until family is notified. Just please say a prayer for the families of the soldiers killed, the ones missing, and everyone involved in the search.

Biscuits Game

This past Thursday night was Alabama State Bar night at the Montgomery Biscuits game. I went and took my dad, brother and his wife with me. We all had a lot of fun and the Biscuits even won on a home run in the ninth inning.

This is the group picture that was taken at the stadium:

Where am I, you are asking? The only time I left my seat during the whole game was to go to the guest services and pick up a baseball that I won in the group raffle. This was when they decided to take the group picture. Just my luck!

Busy Bee

I didn't blog at all last week. I have been really busy at work and with projects at home. Not to mention I had a migraine on Tuesday that prevented me from doing anything besides making a trip to my doctor to get a shot to stop the pain. But overall, not such an eventful week.

These next few weeks are going to be extremely busy as well. My best friend, Jennifer is getting married this Saturday. I took off Friday to help decorate and gets things ready and Saturday I am in the wedding. And after my neice told me last night that I look pregnant, I will not be eating ANY donuts this week in order to not look like a whale in my bridesmaids dress. Then memorial weekend I will be headed to the beach with a friend. And no one wants to see a cow in a bathing suit, LOL.

Another reason I haven't been blogging so much, some craphead hinted that I blog too often and about stupid things. So I have been discouraged from blogging unless I feel like I have a funny story to tell or something important to share. But anyone who is not interested in reading my blogs: DON'T. And if you are subscribed and don't like it, by all means, UNSUBSCRIBE. That is all for now. Hope everyone else is having a great Monday!

Days Off

I took off Thursday - Sunday because I had planned a trip to the beach. The trip got rescheduled but I had already asked for the days off, so I figured I'd just relax and get some things done around the house. I spent the first half of Thursday relaxing and running a couple of errands. But thats all I could stand. If I was going to take days off, I would have to do something productive or I wouldn't feel satisfied. At about 2:00 yesterday, I decided to rent a drum sander and refinish my hardwood floors. Got a lot done yesterday since I only have the sander for 24 hours. I wasn't happy with the first stain color I chose after letting the test spot dry over night. So, I just got home from home depot and am about to test the second color. But I had to stop and eat a donut and blog first. Who can work hard without a good breakfast, right?

So back to work...

Ah-ah-achoo!

I went home for lunch to eat leftovers from grilling out yesterday. It had gotten considerably warmer outside since I got to work this morning, so I rolled down my windows on the drive home. I park in the driveway and go in and help myself to a nice BBQ sauce covered pork chop. (Note: I do not recommend watching the National Geographic's special on Carnivores while you eat a red saucy pork chop.)

When I go to leave, the man who cuts my neighbor's yard is outside mowing. I smile and wave just as I usually do. Then I get inside my car and realize... I left the windows down. Not that my car was clean to begin with, but now after breathing in all the lovely grass and flower clippings that blew into my car, I can't stop sneezing, my eyes are watering and my nose is running. My Monday just keeps getting better!

DMA Timeout

Replace "PC Load Letter" with "DMA Timeout." Replace the fax machine with a scanner. Replace him with me. That is my morning. It's Monday.

Call It What You Want

Yesterday was my grandmother's billionth birthday. The whole family came to her house for dinner, birthday cake and presents and such. (And yes, I attended - red butt and all.) I like to just sit and listen to the things she and all her sisters say. They never cease to amaze, at least entertain, me.

Grandma: When I flew home from Alaska right after 9/11, I was seated between two of them Koreans. And I was scared, because I didn't know if they were one of those folks that flew them planes into those towers...

My Dad: Mother, I don't think the terrorists were from Korea

Grandma: Well... you never know?

I brought a good friend of mine with me last night. Upon hearing this conversation, I glance over at him out of the corner of my eye. He gives me the "Yes, I heard that and I am trying not to laugh" face. Later on, she was asking me about how things were going. And says... "Are you still enjoying working at that War Eagle?" My brother died laughing. Obviously she meant American Eagle so I just answered the question and no one bothered to correct her. What's the point? She's about 90 and can call it whatever she wants.

Warning: You're an Idiot

I went to the tanning bed again last night. The last time I went I burned a little bit, so I took a couple days off. So last night, I went for the same amount of time rather than bumping it up a bit to make sure I didn't burn again. After being in for a few minutes, my butt and lower back started to get pretty hot so I decided I'd better turn over for the remainder of the minutes. When I got out and was getting dresses I looked in the mirror and was shocked! Everywhere on my backside that had been pressed against the glass was a fiery red. And I mean FIERY! There was a solid line where the redness ended. I thought to myself, "I was only a little pink last time, how could this happen?" as I painfully slid my clothes back on over my burns. Suddenly the light bulb popped up over my head. I'm on antibiotics for a bladder infection. And yes, I seem to recall there being a little warning sticker on the bottle that has a picture of the sun. Upon re-reading reading the warning label, I discover that it says "You should avoid prolonged or excessive exposure to direct and/or artificial sunlight while taking this medicine." Yep. Would have been of great value to me to read that BEFORE I burned half of my backside. I put some aloe on it a couple times last night and its not so bad today. But I won't be getting back in the tanning bed till I am done taking this stuff!

Some Things Never Change

For those of you know don't know, I am a web admin and often receive "tech support" calls for people who are having problems with the website. But you don't have to be in tech support to appreciate this one. Anyone who has ever tried to teach an older relative how to use a computer program, laptop, cell phone, digital camera, etc. will certainly be able to relate. Enjoy!

Gotta Love It!

Do you know what tomorrow is? It's Confederate Memorial Day and I'm so excited. Why? You ask why? Well, obviously... because its a state holiday and I am off work!! That's why!

So, since I have the day off... you must be asking what I will be doing? I am going to buy a lawn mower. Yep. Isn't is exciting? Since the wheels fell off my mower in July of 2006 my yard has not been mowed since. I'm not even a little bit kidding. There are weeds that come up to my shoulders and I am not a short girl. The neighborhood cats LOVE my yard because they can hide from unsuspecting small birds and such. So, I apologize to the cats... but their haven will be gone tomorrow when I bring home my very first own lawn mower. Oh, the excitement. I hope I can sleep tonight!

So, goodnight to all you suckers that have to get up early and go to their jobs!!

Strikes again!

On my way to work this morning, I stopped at the grocery store and bought a 20 oz. Mt. Dew and a strawberry Sunkist. I drank the Mt. Dew and put the Sunkist in the refrigerator at work. I just went to get it, and PRESTO, its gone! The refrigerator "borrower" has struck again!! I am soooo mad!

I mean, I know the drink only cost a dollar and some odd change. That is not the point. The point is, I went out of my way this morning to get a drink that we do not carry in our vending machine here and was saving it for this afternoon because I don't normally carry cash for the vending machine. What do you have to do to protect a drink? Maybe I'll put lipstick prints all over the lid next time and it won't be appetizing to anyone?

I did send out a company wide email saying "If you accidentally picked it up, please let me know." I've gotten some pretty funny responses but I was hoping for a tattle tale. No takers so far. I'll keep you posted.

Pain in the Ass

Yesterday, I decided it was time to start going to the tanning bed. I am going to be in a wedding in about a month and thought I should look nice for it. Plus, I hope to go to the beach sometime soon and don’t want to blind anyone with my whiteness.

So, the tanning bed I used to go to has a new location fairly close to my house. I get out of my car and head up to the door. I pull on the door only to find that it’s locked. I’m thinking, “Surely they can’t be closed at 5:00 on a Tuesday” so I squint to look through the glare on the door and into the store. I’m startled when I realize I am face to face with a good looking blond fellow. He laughs and motions me to use the other door. A little embarrassed, I chuckle and head over to the other door. When I get inside, I realize the door I was trying to come in is lined with chairs full of people who are all laughing at me for trying to come in the wrong door. The blond guy is doubled over in his chair laughing, to which I say jokingly, “It wasn’t that funny.”

I go up to the counter and give them my updated address and pay to restart my membership account. When I am done, I turn around to take my seat and the good-looking blond guy says, “So, how have you been?” Oh, great! I even know this guy… I think? I guess he could see the confusion on my face and says, “You don’t remember me do you?”

Searching his face, I say “You look so familiar and I’m trying to place you…”

To which he says, “The last time you saw me I had very long blond hair.” Then I realize he is someone I went to high school with that I haven’t seen in seven years. Great! It’s always nice to run into someone you haven’t seen in years, and manage to make yourself look like a moron. And to top it off, I stayed in the tanning bed for a little too long and I burned my butt. Literally… just my butt. Gives a whole new meaning to “pain in the ass.”

Wardrobe Malfunction

This was an extremely busy weekend for me! I feel like I didn't have a chance to slow down and rest for one moment. Friday as soon as I got off work I ran home and changed into some painting clothes and headed to my bestest friend's house to help her paint and install new doors on their house. I also chopped vegetables and made spinach dip for her wedding shower the following day. I ended up not getting home till nearly 2am.

So needless to say, I was not happy to hear the alarm go off early on a Saturday morning. But I had agreed to help out at a car wash fundraiser given by the Pike Road Volunteer Fire Department. So, I went out there to help for a few hours, then had to rush home and change clothes and get ready for the wedding shower. I had bought a new white dress from American Eagle a couple of months ago and was excited to finally have a good opportunity to wear it. This is the dress:

I thought it looked cute and was appropriate for the occasion. I was, though, slightly embarrassed when I arrived at the shower and was informed that the pale pink waistband on my panties was visible through the back of my dress. But whatever, they are just panties, right? About and hour into the shower, it starts to pour down rain as we expected. Guests began to leave to beat the worst part of the storm. My mother had arrived a bit late since she had taken my sister to an appointment. She was sitting down to eat so I offered to move her van to let someone else out. Bad idea. Very bad idea. My pretty white dress got soaked and became completely see-through. Luckily, when I re-entered the house, the first person to see me was Jennifer's aunt who quickly told me she could see straight through my dress and was well aware that I was not wearing a bra. Greeeeat! I at least had the forethought to bring jeans and a t-shirt to change into after the shower. So, luckily I was able to change before too many people saw my personals!

I did get the chance to sleep in a bit on Sunday morning. I had to work at American Eagle that afternooon until close. We got a whole new floorset in and I think I literally want one of everything! We got some new shirts which I think are very creative and cute. The words are printed on the inside and show through to the outside. The ONLY problem that I have with this... is that everytime I refold all the shirts and get that table looking nice, someone comes right behind me and goes "Oh cute, what does it say" turns them inside out and throws them back on the table. Thanks... really. That's what I am here for apparently. So be warned... if you come in to shop, and I know you, and I see you do such a thing... I WILL kick you. You have been fairly warned.

Double Duty Day!

I'm sure you have an idea of what is coming just from the title. So here goes...

I went to Burger King today to pick up lunch for me and a friend. Since I ordered two drinks, I recieved the following drink holder:

And the title was enough to make me giggle, but I read the description of the Double Duty Box. Since you probably can't see it in the picture, it reads as follows:

A lot of people wonder why it was decided upon to make a two-cup carrier as opposed to say, a one-cup or three-cup carrier. Well, a one-cup carrier is called just a cup. So that was pretty much out. And a three-cup carrier would have to be shaped into some strange triangle, and balancing that contraption would be more trouble than it's worth. So we settled on two. Hopefully it serves you well.

I was entertained. So, I get back from lunch and I call a certain theater here in Montgomery because I saw a commercial on tv last night that led me to believe that a certain play I was interested in seeing had been extended through this weekend. I was told by the box office representative that no, it was not, and she didn't know anything about a commercial. I was pretty confused and actually was beginning to think I was crazy so I emailed the administrative office to inquire (mostly to prove to myself that I was not, in fact, insane) and that such commercial did exist. I received this reply:

Dear OmySue:
Thank you for your input. The performance run [certain play] was cut short due to low attendance. The final performance was Saturday. Our ad spaces are purchased in advance and do not reflect this update. We do apologies for any incontinence or confusion this may have caused.

I overlooked it at first, but yes, he said incontinence! Certainly he doesn't think that I was so upset that I peed myself? I'm thinking he meant "inconvenience." I'll continue to hope so anyway!

Addicts

Ok, this video is pretty long... but if you have EVER been even a little bit addicted to MySpace, you will appreciate it. Especially "the angles".... ha ha ha!

I mean EWWW

I went back to work at AE last night. It was the first night in over a week. It was nice to have a break. So, I walk in and the store is a wreck with clothes piled everywhere that need to be put back. Before I even get clocked in and get my name tag on, a customer is asking for a fitting room. I grab a key and head back to let the woman and her daughter in. I decide to open the big room in the corner for them, since the daughter will probably go in with her. I hold the door open for them and hear them say "Oh my god, that's disgusting."

You might recall an incident at AE that I previously posted about. And I thought I was shocked to find dirty thongs on the floor? But I can't even imagine how this happens?

I mean, seriously? I have several questions for the person who left the nasty maxi pad stuck to the floor in the fitting room. First, what were you doing taking your panties off in the dressing room? If you were trying on a swim suit, 1. you are not supposed to do so without underwear on, and 2. you certainly should not do so while on your period and not wearing underwear. This is the only logical explanation I can think of for this accidentally happening? Or was this just a sick person who thought it would be funny to leave something that gross out for someone else to have to clean up? I don't know. And I really probably don't want to know. Needless to say, I was more than ready to go home when we closed last night.

No Perverts Here

I went to lunch today with my mother. She picked me up at my office and we headed to one of our favorite lunch spots, The Marina. We pulled up to a stoplight just before the interstate and stopped right behind a bright red pick-up truck. We were just sitting there talking, waiting for the light to change, when at the same moment, we both got quiet. I look over at her to see that the same thing has caught her eye. There is something bright red hanging down from the hitch of the truck in front of us. She sees me looking at her funny and says, "Does that look like what I think it is?" We both laugh and the light changes. I quickly whip out my camera phone thinking I have got to get a shot of this! Mom even speeds up so I can try to get a better shot. No such luck... my camera phone is just not that good.

So, when I get back to the office, I do a little research on the internet. I am thinking certainly there is a logical explanation for what we have just seen. I was relieved to find out that we are not in fact perverts, but we had seen exactly what we thought:

Just what everyone needs! Get Your Nuts Today!

Ouch

You know what hurts? Flushing money down the toilet. Not literally, of course. But I paid my speeding ticket from the Nashville fiasco today. Sigh... I have gotten several a few tickets in Alabama before and none of them have ever cost nearly as much as the one I got in Tennessee! What is the deal?

So, anyway. I have shifted the focus of my house rennovations. Since it is warming up, I have started to work in the yard. I think my neighbors are more excited about it than I am. I am pretty sure I have heard cheering and clapping from some of them as they walk by and see me digging up overgrown bushes in the yard. Apparently, I was "that house" and didn't realize it.

I made lots of progress this weekend. I took a break on Saturday night to celebrate St. Patrick's Day with my friend Kelly in Auburn. Her husband asked me if I had a fight with a barbed wire fence. Apparently, you should wear sleeves, gloves and shoes other than flip flops when removing rose bushes. Who would have thought? And I even managed to get sun burned on Sunday afternoon.

Once I get all the plants in order, I am thinking of putting a small koi pond in my yard. I've been doing some research and it doesn't sound like it will be overly difficult. My biggest question is whether or not I have to get permission from the historic society to put it there. I am thinking I would rather go ahead and do it, and ask for forgiveness later than to ask for permission. For right now, I don't even know who I would contact to find out? But I'll just save that for when I get closer to getting ready to start that project.

And another project I am still thinking about... a book. I was thinking that I could just collect all of my crazy stories, my "Amyisms," and put them all in one book? I've been blogging for about a year now and have posted over 200 times?? And thats only the past year. Surely I can think of enough crazy stories to make one book? Would someone publish it? But would it sell? I don't even really know where to begin? Sure, it might just turn into a bathroom book, but I think it is worth a ty, right? But I guess, like anything else, its just one step at a time. Any suggestions or comments are welcome.

Contagious

It's contagious. Yes, duty giggling is contagious. I got a phone call from a friend this weekend and he didn't even say hello, just DUTY. He must have been reading my blog. And also, this:
OMYSUE - Where Are You?
Thanks, Siz! I needed that today!

Duty

I watched (well, most of it before I fell asleep) a WWII movie last night. Patton. Like I have said before, I can’t resist a laugh anytime a person says “duty” no matter what the context. Well, last night in the movie someone came in shouting “Where is the duty officer?” I couldn’t resist. I giggled and looked over at Jason and said, “He said duty.” Then, they said duty about 5 more times and I had to stick my head under the covers to keep from laughing out loud. I could never be a duty officer because I would just laugh all the time. I’m so mature. Jason was probably glad that I fell asleep and he could watch the rest of the movie without my constant giggling.

On another note, I got my hair cut last night for the first time in over 6 months. Nothing too drastic… but I now have bangs. Still getting used to them hanging in my face while I work. This is not the best picture, but you get the idea:

Karma Force Field

Last night, Jason and I were sitting around watching tv. He's still suffering from a broken heart and often mopes around looking depressed. I'm not usually the "there, there, *pat pat*" kind of friend. I'm usually the "I'm going to aggravate you until I make you smile and forget about what's making you sad" kind of friend. So, sitting in my big over stuffed chair I pretend that I am going to throw a pillow at Jason's face while he is lying on the couch. He flinches and laughs and so I go to really throw it this time (and unknowingly to me) the fringe on the throw pillow has managed to snag itself on my little toe. I fling the pillow and suddenly my baby toe feels as if it were just ripped right out of the socket! I look down to see that while it is still there, there is something that looks like rope burn around it. So, later... seeing another sad face, I ball up a napkin, reach way back and to throw it when suddenly a big cramp shoots through my upper back. I think Jason has a karma force field around him and everytime I try to mess with him, it just bounces back at me! I guess I need to just leave him alone!

Non-karma related incident for the night (or so I think anyway):
I cook heat up some chicken noodle soup for us for dinner. I decide I want a grilled cheese to go with mine. I prepare the sandwich and heat up the frying pan. I usually butter one side, throw it in the pan, butter the other side and then flip it. Just as I am ready to flip the grilled cheese, I realize all the spatulas are dirty and in the dishwasher which is running. So, I quickly dig in the drawer for anything that I can use. I find a rubber scraper, which is one of those cheapy dollar store ones that don't withstand high heat. I jam it under the sandwich tearing it up and smearing the cheese all over the pan. The cheese sticks and begins to burn and let me tell you, burned cheese does NOT smell good and it smokes a lot! I continue scraping and throw the pile of burned cheese mess onto a small paper plate. I carry it to Jason in the living room and say "Are you sure you don't want a grilled cheese with your soup, because I'm doing a really good job!" He looked at the mess and laughed, although I am sure he already had an idea what was going on judging from the cursing and smoke that was coming from the kitchen.

I chunked the blob in the trash and started over. And this time, had a spatula ready!

Brief Update

I am swamped at work and not much time to blog. My car wouldn't start again yesterday so I am borrowing Jason's for the day again. Hopefully, we can check it out and get it cranked, otherwise at least get it to a mechanic tonight. I also have to work at AE tonight which further complicates the situation.

Tuesday, I had a terrible migraine. I am so busy here at work that I could only afford to go home for a long lunch a try to sleep it off. It worked for the most part, but man is that getting old. I have an appointment with my doc to discuss the migraines next week.

Yesterday, around 3 (after the car broke down) I started feeling feverish. I got chills all over and all my joints started to ache. I had several errands to run (in Jason's car since mine was dead) and did all of them right after work. I picked up Chinese food and a movie on the way home. I took tylenol as soon as I got home and soon after felt the fever breaking. It's strange though... I've never felt JUST a fever. It's usually coupled with a sore throat or a runny nose. But I had no other symptoms. Let's hope it doesn't come back again or that it was not a sign of things to come, because I CANNOT afford to be sick right now. We ate and watched Borat which I have to say was quite funny and made me feel a lot better!

This morning, I am light-headed and woozy. I bent down to get something out of the bottom dresser drawer this morning and thought I was going to pass out on the floor. My vision went black but I didn't actually pass out. I'm feeling okay right this minute though.

I picked flowers in my yard for a lady I work with whose birthday is today. We are taking her to lunch to celebrate and that will be a much needed break for me from working. Then I'll have to run by the house and let Jason take me back to work so he can get to school. Boy, am I glad to have him around or I would be stranded all the time!

I've been really stressed here at work this week and next week is only going to get worse. So check in on me folks! I need contact with the outside world!

Coffee Break

I don't drink coffee everyday. But some days, its just necessary. But I am pickky about the way I drink my coffee. I put in way too much sugar and use either milk or liquid creamer. So, often I bring my own bottle of flavored creamer and put it in the refrigerator in the breakroom with a label on it so people will know who it belongs to. I don't ever mind sharing. But I would prefer people to ask first, so I am aware that I may be out or running low and know I need to buy more. But someone has been using it without asking. I had suspected it for a while, but this week I brought a brand new bottle and have only used it one time... yet it is almost empty. Shall I put it back in the fridge this way? You think I will get in trouble?

Leave the Pieces

I've heard this song on the radio a few times and really related to the lyrics. I actually thought it was the Dixie Chicks when I first heard it, but learned today that it is actually The Wreckers. Here's the video if you'd rather listen and watch than read the lyrics.

Leave the Pieces As You Go

You're not sure that you love me
But you're not sure enough to let me go
Baby it ain't fair you know
To just keep me hangin' 'round

You say you don't wanna hurt me
Don't wanna to see my tears
So why are you still standing here
Just watching me drown

[Chorus]
And it's alright, yeah I'll be fine
Don't worry 'bout this heart of mine
Just take your love and hit the road
There's nothing you can do or say
You're gonna break my heart anyway
So just leave the pieces when you go

Now you can drag out the heartache
Baby you can make it quick
Really get it over with
And just let me move on

Don't concern yourself
With this mess you've left for me
I can clean it up, you see
Just as long as you're gone

[Chorus]

You not making up your mind
Is killing me and wasting time
I need so much more than that
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

[Chorus]

Leave the pieces when you go
Oh yeah
Leave the pieces when you go
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
Leave the pieces when you go

Danger to Myself

The strangest things happen to me. Really. Just a few minutes ago, I was stretching in my chair. I turn my head to stretch my neck... and uh oh. My earring is caught in the sleeve of my lacy shirt. I wiggle for a second thinking surely I can get loose. Nope. I manage to stand up with my ear stuck to my shoulder and walk toward my officemate saying "Waaaaayne, I think I could use your assistance?"

He laughs and says, "You hooked it in there pretty good, didn't ya?" But he was able to free me without any damage to the earring, my shirt, or my ear! I'm just glad its Friday and I will be going home soon.

Learn Something New Everyday

So, after the day I had on Tuesday... you know, breaking the scanner, no fork at lunch and then spilling my cactus... my day continued.

When I finally clocked out and went to go home, my car wouldn't start. Of course, I was supposed to be heading to work at AE. But I called and they were able to get someone to cover my shift so that I could deal with my car. My dad comes and we try the obvious first. We jump it off and it starts right up. I breathe a sigh of relief thinking "Good, it's just the battery." But to be on the safe side, we drive it to an AutoZone to let them test the battery and make sure I don't need a new one. They test it and say that it's fine, but once again the car won't crank. So they Auto Zone guy asks me... "When is the last time you checked the water in it?" And I am thinking the radiator? I had no idea that you could, much less should, put water in your car's battery?? He added water to the battery with something that looked like a turkey baster. I know he thought I was a moron. So, I leave the car running in the parkiing lot at Captain D's so that the battery can recharge.

When I leave, I decide to go to my parent's house, just in case it still won't start. Then at least I won't be stranded somewhere with no ride. I go inside and visit for a while. I'm sitting on the couch and their yorky, Jax, jumps up on the back of the couch. I hear a burping sound and then something warm all down my back. Yes, he threw up on me. I don't know how that much yucky stuff can come out of such a small dog. Luckily, I had a clean shirt in the closet in my old room. It was a long day.